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We women live in a male dominated society; this we have heard ever since we are born. I’ll not dwell upon how women are treated by men. Rather, I am going to talk about a less exposed fact, how women get let down by other women. We should consider ourselves the luckiest generation as we have not seen this kind of unprecedented technological advancements before. In most ancient cultures, treatment with women used to be below par. But now we see a more leveled playing field for women with their participation ensured in all major spheres of modern society.

 

Read more: Continuing scourge of honor killing in Pakistan

At home, if we compare the life of urban Pakistani women with rest of Muslim world, we’ll note more access to opportunities such as working in corporates, military and acting as entrepreneurs. With all this blissfulness, women sometimes develop a sense of insecurity. They develop an attitude to degrade each other and humiliate other women at any given opportunity. This is alarming! You’ll get what’s in store for you. Nobody will snatch your luck; this should be our belief.

Shallowness of society

The character of a woman is a complex, emotional roller coaster ride. If the ride is taken in the right direction, you can enjoy the journey but if not then the woman can singlehandedly destroy relations.

This negative behavior stems in part from shallowness that associates materialism and partly lack of grooming. Our education system needs to inculcate the ethos of faith and compassion in our children, especially females. It is rightly said, “You educate a man, you educate a man. You educate a woman; you educate a generation.” Why are other countries progressing so rapidly and not us?

There are far more horrendous problems going around in the world and here (us) ladies are bothered about trivial matters. Grievances can vary from who didn’t wish you birthday to whose party you were not invited to! Sometimes it can be someone not praising the trendy clutch or stilettos or talking rot about you. Vanity gets the better of us in most cases and truth is not very welcome. The craving for superiority drives a superficial culture. This fosters negativity, gossip, and catfights. This needs to change. Spread positive vibes around you. I’m jotting down a few handy tips, concisely for the memorandum:

  • Incorporate acceptance inside you.
  • Be patient, give others second chances.
  • Don’t spread rumors until you are sure about them.
  • Don’t think anybody of less stature, we all are human beings.
  • Be one of a kind. Following others footsteps blindly won’t make you popular. Be your own leader.
  • Indulge yourself in productivity. Don’t waste time in idle conversation, taking loads of pictures, wasting hours on social media or commenting on each other profiles. Think about bringing a change or creating a healthy atmosphere around yourself.
  • Lastly, life is short, who knows when it ends, therefore, be careful in using your words or dealing others, it might come back to pay you in the same manner you wished for others.

Excessive use of social media

We are all living in the age of social media, use it wisely. I’ve seen women wasting their time online and complaining about not having time for their families. We need to prioritize our activities. Real life is what, which happens outside the box of our TABs and mobiles. Don’t take social media aggressively. The make believes world of facebook can create an illusion of perfect life. No need to compare your life with that of others.

Read more: Why Improving female conditions depends on outlawing dowry

Life is a combination of many things and you can never have the best of everything. Make an effort to create a balance of your own. Spend time with your husband and kids, complete your household chores, take care of your job if applicable. You’ll feel accomplished. Money, 24/7 socializing, over indulgence in materialism won’t fetch satisfaction.

if we compare the life of urban Pakistani women with rest of Muslim world, we’ll note more access to opportunities such as working in corporates, military and acting as entrepreneurs.

People are prone to crib and backbite. It is attractive to find flaws in others. Rather develop a sense of constructive criticism. On the other hand, we should have the tolerance to absorb feedback. There are always two sides of the story. Keep an open mind, never believe the façade. One needs to see things from other perspectives too. If you think that the other lady is wrong, you might need to ponder on your conduct as well. What goes around comes around. The tables can always turn so always be extra cautious while dealing with relationships or friendships.

In real life, many stories are left untold but in today’s advanced world we can resolve problems by adopting a healthy approach. Ignoring people, bad mouthing others will not harm the other party rather you are polluting your own mind with evil thoughts. Remember; life goes on for everyone, it’s the dignity you have to maintain. Many a time I suggest people to keep quiet during bad times as time is a great healer.

The character of a woman is a complex, emotional roller coaster ride. If the ride is taken in the right direction, you can enjoy the journey but if not then the woman can singlehandedly destroy relations. There is so much potential to do good. Focus on the positive and build a culture of love.

Saba Waqas lives in Islamabad. With interests in cooking, traveling, and exploring various cultures, additionally, she writes articles regarding social matters.

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